Learning love

Never have I been on the recieving end of so much love, or at least made aware that I am. And I am dealing with it well. The little inconvieniences that come with another thinking the world of you I recognize are little signs of love: love is the only source. And there is nothing negative for me, or not worth my while, when it comes to love. I most certainly have everything to gain from it. While I would normally be feeling soffocated or like my identity is being threatened, I now go about my business and occasionally remember there is someone who would do anything for me. More and more frequently this thought occurs until I find myself acting less selfishly and taking this love into account, including this being and their feelings.

I just got back from a backpacking trip with Lance, my dog. It was the first time I had been alone with him for an extended amount of time. And alone we were. His protection, gratitdue, and inquisition was concentrated on one person. And it was intense. But hiking with him has taught me to adjust, comprimise, accept, and be patient. WIth him comes responsibility and commitment, but safety and companionship as well.

I had a dream last night that I feel in love. With a human being, that is. I was at Mideval Times, but it was much different: casual, more interactive, etc. I was watching from a wall and one of the performers came and flirted with another sitting by me, as part of the show. But he ended up sitting on my lap for most of the performance. Next thing I know I am leaving his house after meeting his mom and we are cruising down the street on one of those mobile town tour excursions and being very close, open, and having a lot of fun. I wasn't holding anything back and I actually liked the guy: those two things occur but rarely hand in hand.